Bloody sinner. Misfortune of 2011
I know I've written something good last week and sad to say I might have sinned again today.
Oh life.
It does feel awful to try to be good and fall short again.
Unless I'm convinced that what I'm doing is wrong only then can I stop. I can only trust that God will teach me and show me how to follow Him.
I'm guilty of talking shit before others. This is what has been bothering me this week.
I know I should try to be a good example but I'm not coz I'm still very angry and when I'm angry I talk shit.
I say this year has not been good to me because I did not achieve two of my major goals.
1. Finish the bible in a year.
2. Save money so I can have vacation abroad for a month
Not only did I fail to achieve my goals this year.. I also broke up with my girlfriend and lost someone very special to me.
Heartbreaks and heartaches are all over me this year 2011.
Can I think of anything good that happened to me?
I also got these rashes which made me feel so bad also.
What good is in store for me as this year ends? I have no idea.
I know I should count my blessings but for such a time as this, nothing would make me happier than to have you back in my life.
Because of you I discovered a lot of songs that I need to get by. Because of you I have a reason to be happy because you are my happiness and nothing else.
I cannot and will not deny that it is you. And if there is something I would like God to give me, that would be you.
I really wish I can just be this wandering soul who will always watch over you. I don't mind dying now as long as I get to watch you always.
This morning my dream was really sad because I lost my mom in this dream. I was telling my father how much I miss my mom and I wish I can go to heaven to see her right away so we can be together again.
I woke up with so much bitterness in my heart because I know one day we must die and I wish I never have to.
Someday we will die but I wish to see all of my friends and family in one place which is in heaven. I love the people that came to my life and I never wanted to lose them.
Because of this dream I'm trying to make my life count by trying to live a better life. I wish can still do a lot of good things for others. I wish I can serve others and the Lord in my lifetime. I wish I can give my heart and love others.
Thinking of losing someone over death makes me really sad. Life is short. I only have this time and this moment to tell my parents and friends how much I love them.
I really wish we see each other in heaven. I really wish all of us will serve the Lord.
2011 is about to end. May I learn to trust and obey the Lord everyday.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
